Skip to main content

tv   The Daily Show With Jon Stewart  Comedy Central  January 15, 2013 1:00am-1:30am PST

1:00 am
- hey, hey, stan. you're not gonna believe it. you gotta come see. - what? - it's a miracle. [all chattering] - kyle. - hey, stan. - dude, what happened? hape - we don't know. we were all passed out, and next thing we know, we just woke up on a bus heading here. woku - it's like you had a guardian angel, m'kay. yoa - oh, dude, i'm so glad you're not dead., i'm so - so i guess there's nothing left to do now but rebuild.t - yeah, first off, we're all gonna need new cars. and let's just make sure nobody gets a stupid hybrid, right?se - that's right. - you said it.you s - no, hybrid cars are a good thing. good t - but hybrid cars are the leading cause of smug. leadi - hybrid cars don't cause smugness. people do. - lolk, hybrid cars are important. they may even save our planet one day.hey what you all need to do is just learn to drive hybrids and not be smug about it.smb you mean, drive in hybrids, but not act like ,
1:01 am
we're better than everyone else because of it?else b - yeah. - i'm--i'm not ready. - i don't think i can do it either. - it's simply asking too much.ly without being smug about it, but for now.without the technology is just too much for us. come on- everybody, let's go buy wasteful gas guzzlers.ybodyl - let's go. - that's right. - well, looks like you're back for good, huh, kyle? - yeah, i guess so.guess s - we just can't get rid of you, can we, you sneaky jew rat? - don't belittle my people, you [bleep]ing fat ass.you- - [sighs] that's better.. captioning by captionmax www.captionmax.comomedy c >> january 14, 2013. from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with jon stewart.
1:02 am
( cheers and applause ) >> jon: hello, everybody. welcome to the daily show. my name is jon stewart. our guest tonight is the great one, roger waters of pink floyd will be going up here. obviously the interview will be accompanied by a laser show. let me just get right to it. if you are here and you did recently get married (laughing), you have to bring your sister along? i don't want to get into it now. before we begin, one quick bit of housekeeping. last thursday we took a bit of a is a tearial look at an idea that the president could solve some of our fiscal issues by exploiting a legal loophole and minting a trillion dollar coin. i'm not an economist but if we're just going to make [bleep] up, i said go home.
1:03 am
how about a $20 trillion coin or forget about it. i was digging through the white house couch cushions and eisenhower must have left this $100 quillion bill. i know it's real because it has our nation's previous seal, a unicorn ferching ason tawr. saucy. we did receive a bit of pushback on that from the only creature perhaps more noble than a freshly felched unicorn. and the point is this. we heard from the rare gray-bearded urban laureate economist paul krugman. anyway, he wrote on his blog there he called me lazy. said there was a lack of professionalism on the part of of me and my staff.
1:04 am
for finding privilege olity in the idea of a temporary trillion dollar coin. first of all, lazy? i'm banging it out 22 minutes a day. ( cheers and applause ) don't tell me i don't work hard. and second of all, don't blame my ignorance on my staff. it's all me. you know, they got enough to do what with carrying me from cubicle to cubicle. as we learned earlier, i'm lazy. so what is your beef? and if you could put it in web cast form, saturate the color and tilt that [bleep] >> understanding what the issues are. the reason we've gotten to this place he did it as a sort of yuk yuk yuk stupid. when he just turns it into dumb, oh, i don't know nothing but those people look stupid to me, he's actually, he's ruining his
1:05 am
own brand. >> jon: first of all, i'm pretty sure that is my brand. and second of all,... ( cheers and applause ) ... what? if anybody is ruining their brand, with a trillion dollar coin idea, i don't think it's the noneconomist. look. as we most bits we do, whether of the fully fleshed-out or more drive-by variety, there are always various counterarguments and nuances of language and thought which can be cited as evidence of this show's inherent unfairness or ignorance. typically a bluntness people forgive when in agreement with our point of view. so i standby our research on this topic. with due diligence and my ignorance inclusion that a trillion dollar coin is a stupid [bleep] idea.
1:06 am
and i'm a fan of paul krugman. all right. of course that's not the only issue facing obama. >> president obama's picks for his new cabinet members raising some questions. let's take a look at his four newest choices. one thing you might notice about all of them, anybody want to jump in. what do you think >> jon: that's kiss without the make-up. i know these guys. yes! play "lick it up." >> where are the women, for example? where are the people of color? the fourth white male mr. obama has chosen in the last month >> where are the women? where are the minors >> jon: you're telling me the president, the president of the united states couldn't have found one woman or minority to fill an important job? what about instead of john kerry susan rice for secretary of state. lady and minority. triple word score >> i will do everything in my power to block her. she's not qualified. >> jon: oh, right.
1:07 am
mccain. do you have any evidence that barack obama himself is somewhat diverse is being discriminatory in his hiring practices >> the "new york times" ran this photo the other day showing the president with a group of all white men advising him in the oval office. >> jon: first of all computer enhanced. there's a black guy right there. now i'm not saying that balances everything out but that is a black guy. and there is another black guy who appears to be running the meeting. still, fair point. there aren't any women in the photo. >> this photo shows the president surrounded by all male advisors although the white house says top aide valerie jarrett is hidden behind the men. >> jon: that's just valerie jarrett's style. here she is at the '08 inauguration. here she is at tianamen square. here she is with buzz aldrin on the moon. she's like a living where's
1:08 am
waldo. here she is behind waldo. you know what? i'd like to hear the president's excuse for this. actually, i can hear the president's excuse for this >> i'm very proud that in the first four years that we had as diverse if not more diverse a white house and a cabinet than any in history. what? i've made four appointments so far. i would suggest that everybody kind of wait until they've seen all my appointments, who is in the white house staff and who is in my cabinet before they rush to judgment. >> jon: for more we're joined by senior white house correspondent jessica williams. thank you for joining us ( cheers and applause ) jessica, all last year the concern about obama in his second term was going to be that he's going to go full on like socialist black panther one world government. now he appears to have gone more season one of mad men. what's happening? >> john, people forget, president obama is also half
1:09 am
white. everybody was was so focused on black obama and all the black stuff he did in his first term. obama care, food stamp. they completely forgot about white obama who has been in there biding his time. just waiting to take this country back and restore the traditional america this black obama has worked so hard to destroy. >> jon: wow. exactly jon: i got so say, white obama has been playing a long game >> jon, you know, white obama has always been there making the occasional appearance. on vacation. on weekends. i mean, you're not going to catch a brother wearing those jeans and a bike helmet on a ten speed with cross trainers on. >> jon: that white obama is pretty white. >> the whitest. jon: so if white obama is 50%
1:10 am
and black obama is 50%... >> well he's not quite like that, okay. according to the white obama, black obama is only 47% of total obama. >> jon: what? yeah. he says that 47% feels it's entitled to something from the government. >> jon: what's the other 3%? white obama is pretty sure it's latino. >> jon: what? how did that happen? >> white obama doesn't know. if we don't put a stop to it, the president will be almost all latino by 2020. >> jon: oh, my god. so white obama is in charge now? >> yep. he's going to return this country to the greatness of the founders. with a cabinet of white guys. >> jon: all right. it's going to be great. jon: it's going to be great. i know. i hear you. >> get it out. jon: knock it right now. thank you very much. b)%p
1:11 am
1:12 am
1:13 am
( cheers and applause ) >> jon: welcome back. investigative journalism. whatever happened to that? john oliver investigates in his new investigation, investigating investigative journalism >> reporter: in the post 9/11 world i vitally important that americans are educated about what's happening overseas. that's what makes reporters like
1:14 am
cnn's indispensable. a navy seal reservist has tracked pirates off the coast of indonesia, crawled through drug tunnels in mexico and journeyed to wherever the [bleep] this is >> if you want to know what's going on in the world, you actually have to get out into the world. you can't do it from behind a desk. >> reporter: what have you got coming up next? >> west africa. you have an entire government that's effectively being run by drug cartels from south america >> reporter: you can look forward to that story airing on cnn very soon. >> i'm not working at cnn anymore. cnn eliminated its entire investigative unit >> reporter: what? they've eliminated the department that i was working for where i was doing those international investigative reports >> reporter: cnn, the worldwide leader in news, has eliminated its investigative news department? >> yes. reporter: i'm just letting that sink in a second.
1:15 am
it's taking a while. it's just going in. holy [bleep]. yet last spring cnn dismissed almost their entire special investigative documentary documentary unit. i spoke to professional media analyst brad atgate who offers in favor of talking heads over boots on the ground reporting cnn is finally raising itself up to meet the low standards of its competitors >> sad to say investigative journalism is on the way out. it's usually the first one to go because it's not a profit center >> reporter: let's say i knew an investigative journalist doing an investigation on a haven for drug smuggling. does that sound interesting? >> no. reporter: that doesn't sound like an interesting story >> you could stay in the united states and do that >> reporter: right. but it's a good story, brad >> yeah, but, you know, there
1:16 am
are a lot of good stories out there that we'll never know. >> reporter: we'll never know because people like you say they're not profitable. >> exactly. reporter: because you're saying exactly like that's a good thing >> yeah. but we don't have to fly to some remote location, you know, to interview someone. you can just sit and you skype and save money that way. >> reporter: but, brad, i don't know how many child soldiers in sierra leone you skype >> traveling around the world for investigative journalism, those days are gone. it's just too costly >> reporter: it's true. spending thousands of dollars on an investigation in africa is way too expensive. especially when you're already spending thousands of dollars on vital reporting tools like hologram journalists. >> jessica yellin works at cnn. why do they need a hologram of her? >> reporter: that was the
1:17 am
stupidest question i've ever heard. because the hologram is cooler. look at you right now. are you a hologram? >> oh, no. reporter: you're a real reporter. that's much less good. it seems there's no place for him in this modern news landscape. today he supplements his income as a trainer waiting for the opportunity to work with another news organization. >> i actually have an extraordinary job >> reporter: that's great. where is that? >> i work at news room reporter: which one? the news room. the hbo show about the news industry. and i pitch them ideas about investigative stories. and then they take those real-world ideas and they inject them into the plot lines of the show. >> reporter: no, no, no. this can't be right. please tell me that the only news room hiring people like him is not a pretend one. excuse me. >> who the hell are you? reporter: sorry to interrupt but i have to check something. do you know who this is in >> he works here
1:18 am
reporter: really? i have a follow-up question then. are you real? because i really need you to be real. >> are you all right? not really reporter: executive producer mckenzie, right? >> no, i'm emily. that's true. she was in shutter island >> reporter: shut up this is stage 7. it's the set. look up. there's no ceiling. >> reporter: there is no way i'm looking up there. our news is from a year ago. look at the monitors. romney losing ground to santorum. holy [bleep]. that is depressing. look, before we leave, would you mind doing an inspirational sort of speech over soaring music just to make me feel like there's at least some hope. >> sure. just because news night isn't real doesn't mean it can't be. television news is a struggle between reporters who see journalism as a sacred blessing
1:19 am
and a corporate culture that exploits the worst in human nature, dumbs down the national conversation. but if you keep doing what you're doing, it won't matter if you're on cnn, fox or you-tube, people will find you. >> reporter: wow. would you mind giving me a hug? >> get out. you can leave through the open space where there's supposed to be a wall. >> reporter: makes sense. let's go. don't worry, america. in the fictional world investigative journalism is alive and well. it's only in the real world where it's completely [bleep].
1:20 am
1:21 am
1:22 am
1:23 am
( cheers and applause ) >> jon: welcome back. my guest tonight a founding member of the legendary band pink floyd. he will continue his tour this summer in europe. please welcome to the program roger waters. i can't hug you. you're a good man, roger waters. come and sit down. i would hug him. he's here on a medical... you got a little bit of the flu. >> kind of bit jon: i appreciate you coming out here >> to project tile vomit. i would suggest that you move to one side. >> jon: when you suggest it, i will move because with your accent that sounded lovely to me. >> thank you so much jon: the way that... proceed
1:24 am
vectile vomit. it sounds like i'll have that and a scone please >> i am on my best behavior jon: you don't need to be i very rarely wear a shirt and tie >> jon: every time i see roger waters, first of all, seminal rock'n'roll ( cheers and applause ) i still am in trouble from... do you know in the old pink floyd album you had the stickers that came with the album. put them up all over my door. still there. >> we used to have very good adhesives in those days. >> jon: luckily, i still live at home so it's not a problem. every time i see you, you, the archtypal rebellious rock'n'roller are just out there doing good in the world. i wanted to thank you for that. you're out there at the 12-12 benefit for sandy flood relief. you've done a lot of work with wounded warriors. ( applause )
1:25 am
i'm especially interested, there was a wounded warrior benefit where you put together a band from walter reed. tell me how that came to be >> well, a couple of years ago, bob wood rough asked me to go and just hang out at the drinks thing before stand-up, which you were doing >> jon: stand-up for heroes in new york at the beacon theater. >> and bruce springsteen snop i'm familiar with him >> i know you are. i was snowing back stage at your show how very, very quickly you talk >> jon: unbelievable. i desperately try to keep up with you >> jon: you don't have to. can i tell you what i have? aterol. do you want some? >> thank you, no. so anyway, they said will you come next year because. then i had this whacky idea
1:26 am
which was to put together a band of vets back from either afghanistan or iraq or whatever and maybe put a band together. they went what? and then they apparently said yes. so i met this lovely man at walter reed who runs a program there called music call where they teach them to play musical instruments or help them to recover their ability that they might have lost >> jon: right. to play amuseical instrument. so i went down to walter reed a few times with my good friend. we put together a band of 12 guys. they were amazing. >> jon: i mean, people were bonkers. they went bonkers. >> these guys are so beautiful. i love them so much. >> jon: you did a great job with it. ( applause ) now, you're going back on the road with the remaining members
1:27 am
of pink floyd, right? you guys are going. >> this is how he makes his living. that is funny. >> jon: you got to point certain things out. where are you going to start with on the international tour? >> well, we're just doing europe now. i think i may have squeezed both north and south america dry. >> jon: really? i've been here almost without peace for the last two years. it's been fabulous. we have a terrific time particularly here in new york city. ( cheers and applause ) >> jon: well, new york city is, you know, we are enormous fans of walls here in new york city. whether it's your wall. what keeps it fresh for you still? do you find new things in the songs that you've written years ago? do you find... how do you reconnect to that material? i know at 12-12 you had someone on who was amazing. how do you reconnect? >> the version of the wall that i'm doing now, if it's from the
1:28 am
one that i did with pink floyd in 1979-80 and that is far more universal in its message. it's no longer about that miserable self-serving nasty little roger that we all hated those years ago >> jon: never crazy about him. it's more about what you accused me of which is the rebellion that the trying to understand the world and help people occasionally. >> jon: and the compassion that you display in those pursuit >> once does have empathy for people who are in trouble. >> jon: you, my friend, are more generous even with the flu than many will ever know. i really appreciate it. i thank you for being with us. ( cheers and applause ) roger waters. we're going to let him go and rest up and hydrate. the great roger waters. ( cheers and applause )
1:29 am